Former Coventry City striker Micky Quinn spent the weeks after this season's Premier League fixtures were released impatiently checking his phone and waiting for a Sky Sports booking that never came.
Coventry City are returning from a 25-year exile from the top flight to launch their campaign against defending champions Arsenal, live on Sky on the opening Friday night.
Quinn believed he would have been the perfect studio guest to entertain armchair viewers with stories of his opening day hat-trick in Coventry's 3-0 victory at Highbury during the 1993-94 season.
"Can't believe they haven't called," quips Quinn, only half-joking. "Their loss."
His roguish wit will instead be available on Friday at Mr Shenanigans in Coventry for a pre-match Q&A, followed by a live screening of the game and a late bar open until 3am, which Quinn noted sounds like more fun than a night on Holloway Road with pundits Roy Keane and Gary Neville.
"I'm looking forward to seeing how Coventry go," he says. "They play a lovely brand of football, there's a harmony at the club and a great spirit under Frank Lampard. Are they going to be strong enough? I don't know. They can take heart from Leeds and Sunderland staying up last season. Hopefully, they can surprise a few."
Highbury Hat-Trick in 1993
It is 33 years since Quinn scored his memorable opening-weekend hat-trick at Highbury when manager Bobby Gould led Coventry to a 3-0 victory over Arsenal.
"Arsenal weren't ready for us," says the 64-year-old former forward. "They'd won the FA Cup and League Cup the season before and didn't expect Bobby Gould to go 4-3-3 against the England back five."
Quinn featured up front alongside Peter Ndlovu and Roy Wegerle, whose mobility caused severe problems for Arsenal defender Tony Adams and his teammates.
"I was up front with two fantastic players, Peter Ndlovu and Roy Wegerle," Quinn says. "They were so mobile, dropping deep, going wide. The likes of Tony Adams couldn't handle them."
Ndlovu won a penalty for Coventry's first goal after being brought down by Lee Dixon. Quinn converted the spot-kick in front of a Clock End stand that was closed for renovation.
Wegerle set up both second-half goals on the break, starting with a backheel that set up Quinn's second goal past goalkeeper David Seaman.
"Roy backheeled one to me and it was one of the best finishes of my career," says Quinn. "I guided it, left foot. Just passed it into the top corner past David Seaman. Ian Wright came up and said it was one of the best finishes he'd ever seen."
Quinn completed his hat-trick with another powerful strike past Seaman. "The hat-trick goal wasn't too shabby neither," Quinn says. "Bit wider this time and I hit it with enough power. It swerved a little bit. He got his fingers to it but couldn't stop it going in."
Quinn was told he was the first visiting player to score a league hat-trick at Highbury for more than 70 years. "I don't know if anybody has done it since because they knocked the ground down," he adds.
The Funky Chicken Celebration and Army Training
Online footage of the Highbury match shows Quinn and teammate John Williams celebrating the hat-trick goal with a chicken dance.
"I took the lads on a bonding session," Quinn explains. "We were in a '70s disco night in a club outside Coventry and this song called Funky Chicken came on. We were laughing and said whoever scored the first goal at Highbury we'd all do the funky chicken dance."
However, few teammates joined in during the match. "They either forgot because they were too p***ed to remember or they were too embarrassed because when me and John Williams attempted this stupid dance no one else did it," Quinn says.
Arsenal manager George Graham was unimpressed with his team's performance, leading to a post-match exchange with midfielder Paul Merson.
"Paul Merson always says George had a go at him for going out on Thursday night and not preparing right," Quinn says. "Merse's response was, 'Well, Quinny was out on Friday night and he scored three goals'. I wasn't really. He was just trying to get himself out of the s***e."
Coventry's pre-season preparation under Gould had also included rigorous military fitness training with the army at Aldershot.
"Assault courses, night manoeuvres, everything," says Quinn. "Camping out in the woods, pitching tents in the woods in the dark, building campfires. The army lads were skinning rabbits."
Prolific Start at Coventry and Premier League Records
Quinn joined Coventry at the age of 30, completing a £250,000 move from Newcastle United in November 1992.
"Bobby Gould was great for me," says Quinn. "We got on like a house on fire. He said I reminded him of himself, an aggressive goalscoring centre forward."
Gould gave Quinn direct instructions upon arrival. "When I signed, he said, 'We've got a decent team here but we can't score any f***ing goals. That's why you're here. So don't come back for corners or free-kicks, conserve your energy and get in the box'. And I did. I exploded."
Quinn scored ten goals in his first six games for Coventry, setting a record for a new signing in the Premier League that stood for nearly 30 years.
While Sergio Aguero and Diego Costa reached nine goals in their first six games, Erling Haaland eventually broke the total after arriving at Manchester City.
"I'm not one of them who says records are there to be broken," Quinn says. "They survived nearly 30 years. I remember being in a pub one Saturday when Haaland arrived and he's scored again and the graphics come up showing you the records with all these world-class players and there's me among them."
However, Quinn still holds one record that Haaland did not break: scoring in all of his first six Premier League games from debut. Haaland failed to score in his second game against Bournemouth.
"There is one he didn't break," Quinn says. "I scored in all my first six Premier League games from debut. No one else has done that. Haaland didn't score in his second game against Bournemouth. That's the only one left."
Early Career and Failed Transfer to Manchester City
Manchester City had attempted to sign Quinn back in 1984 after he scored 39 goals in 63 appearances for Stockport County, where he won the first of his three Golden Boot awards in the old Division Four.
Oldham Athletic, Manchester City, and Blackpool all competed for his signature, but Stockport's chairman blocked a move to Manchester City over payment terms on the £52,000 fee.
"Oldham, Man City and Blackpool came in," Quinn recalls. "I spoke to Blackpool who were in the same division as Stockport. City and Oldham were in the second, but the chairman said I couldn't speak to City. The fee was £52,000 and City wanted to pay catalogue style, over two or three years. They were that skint."
Oldham Athletic paid the full fee upfront, allowing manager Joe Royle to sign Quinn. "Oldham and Blackpool fronted up the money," Quinn says. "I went to Oldham with Joe Royle and he took me under his wing, nurtured me and got rid of the rough edges. Between Joe and Alan Ball at Portsmouth they crafted a striker."
Quinn described his single-minded dedication to scoring throughout his playing career. "I just dreamed about goals, like every goalscorer," he says. "I didn't sleep in the summer if I hadn't banged in 20 league goals."
Assessment of Viktor Gyokeres and Arsenal Title Hopes
Quinn applied those standards when assessing former Coventry striker Viktor Gyokeres, who scored 40 goals in 97 games for the Sky Blues before joining Sporting Lisbon in 2023 for £64 million.
Gyokeres scored 14 Premier League goals during his first season at Arsenal following his move from Sporting Lisbon, but Quinn remains unconvinced by the forward's output.
"Not a huge fan, to tell you the truth," says Quinn. "Workmanlike at Arsenal but doesn't get the goals he should. If you're the centre forward in an Arsenal team you need to be getting 20 a season minimum with the chances they create."
Quinn believes Arsenal need an elite goalscorer if they are to win major silverware. "The one thing they need if they are going to cement their status among the very best and go on and win a Champions League is a goalscorer," Quinn says. "If they get Julian Alvarez he is different class and I think they'll win the Premier League again."
He added: "In the main, Gyokeres has been massively disappointing. I hope that doesn't come back to haunt me on the night."
Liverpool Demolition and England Snub
Quinn's early goalscoring run at Coventry included two goals during a 5-1 victory against Liverpool, creating an awkward moment with his family of Liverpool supporters.
Quinn had bought them five or six tickets and passes for the players' lounge. "My family are all Liverpool supporters, so I got them five or six tickets and some passes for the players' lounge," he recalls. "Their psyche was: 'We'll go down and see our Mick, hopefully Liverpool batter Coventry and he has a good game and scores.'"
Coventry's resounding win left his relatives stunned. "We beat them 5-1 and I got a couple," Quinn says. "I went in the players' lounge and found them all with faces longer than Ruud van Nistelrooy. You could've picked their jaws up off the floor. They didn't even say well done!"
Upon returning to his father's pub on the Cantril Farm estate in Liverpool, local Everton supporters bought him drinks until he scored twice against Everton later that season.
Quinn ended the 1992-93 campaign with 17 goals. After starting the following season with his Highbury hat-trick, calls grew for an international call-up ahead of England's World Cup qualifier against San Marino, where Graham Taylor's side needed an eight-goal victory.
Despite media pressure to select Quinn due to injuries among England's strikers, Taylor did not call him up. "Coventry were never a sexy club compared to some and there was a lot of bias, but for once the Press were pushing me to play against San Marino because England needed to score eight," Quinn says.
"Some of the strikers were injured and they were all saying: 'Play Quinny for a one-off game.' Graham Taylor was the manager. He totally ignored it. I knew then it wasn't about talent. That's the closest I came but I never had a phone call or nothing."
