Do you know who Spartak is according to the horoscope?
Women get offended when men make fun of birth charts and horoscopes. Tarot cards, love spells and other profitable pranks are very popular. According to polls, 71% of Russians believe in horoscopes. Not only impudent Zarema Salikhova and maudlin Raymond Domenech are among the fans of astrology. And although horoscopes in the press are usually written from the heads of random journalists, on April 1st, when everyone is ready for pranks, let’s play with your imagination. Let’s try real horoscopes for a year at clubs RPL according to their zodiac sign. Not that of the uncaught maniac, but the one that amuses, if not taken too seriously.
Aries (March 21 – April 20) – Spartak and Dynamo
The first sign of the zodiac. Jupiter in the sign of Aries means that one of the two big clubs in Moscow is celebrating its centenary. Wikipedia and the stars confirm this. Astrologers advise Aries to leave the past behind. Both teams did well, greatness is a thing of the past. And fans are encouraged to “think outside the box.” We have to, because their favorite teams are unstable. But since the Twins, represented by Zenit, gave way to Dynamo in the Cup, maybe there will be a final against Spartak again?
Taurus (April 21 – May 20) – “Rostov” and “Wings of the Soviets”
Astrologers promise Karpin and Osinkin a new beginning. After another round of inevitable sell-offs, here’s what the coaches are going to do. “Wings of the Soviets” was updated, gave valuable players to others, and “Rostov” awaits farewell to Glebov and company. Physical activity is recommended for Taurus. A suggestion that it is necessary to strengthen the high pressure? Rostov is also promised recognition. Is it time for Karpin to get ready to celebrate second place?
Gemini (May 21 – June 21) – Zenit, Pari NN and Sochi
The younger brothers of the Gemini from Zenit, as expected, tried to get out of hand. Astrologers promise them romance and love. Berdyev will teach you to love revenge after failure and Gorlov will try to make fans fall in love with him RPL. Gemini is also promised profit. Looks like Malcolm will be in Paris. They also predict difficulties along the way. Sounds like a prediction for Virage.
Cancer (June 22 – July 22) – Lokomotiv
Cancer sank last year. Now Galaktionov has come, he has become one of the few mentors who started with four victories in the new team RPL. Astrologers promise Cancers a great year. Stable and growing financial position, but problems in the family are possible. Unsurprisingly, uncle Artyom Dzyuba was added to the family.
Leo (July 23 – August 23) – Akhmat and Torpedo
“Akhmat” – a young lion. And “Torpedo” is an old lion, prized, but in a deplorable state in a dilapidated cage. Star reading masters recommend Lions to remain calm, which is always relevant for the Grozny team. Astrologers also promise them marriages. Who is a bachelor in the compositions of Akhmat and Torpedo? All the boys have arrived.
Virgo (August 24 – September 23) – CSKA and Urals
Astrologers have hit the sky with financial planning. Fan CSKA in winter there were no transfers. But if Diveev, Zainutdinov and Chalov go to the top 5 in the summer, then there will be money and the need for transfers. Virgos were also promised great energy. It seems that Ural will soon begin a new unbeaten streak, the stars ordered.
Libra (September 24 – October 23), Scorpio (October 24 – November 22), Sagittarius (November 23 – December 21) – not in RPL
There are no clubs under these zodiac signs RPL in this season. Do you have Libra, Scorpio and Sagittarius among you? If yes, then we note that professional charlatans promise you good luck. Only Libra will have ups and downs in her personal life, Scorpios will have peace at home and Sagittarius will have love adventures.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 21) – Khimki, Fakel, Orenburg
They say they should smile. Khimki and Fakel will not laugh if they fly away. And Orenburg will be sad without Lichka. Astrologers assure that Capricorns can do whatever they want with money, it won’t get worse. And it’s true, because Khimki and Fakel have no money. And “Orenburg” joined the tube. But Voronezh football has not yet glued its fins, so astrologers recommend that fans of these clubs get infected with optimism, but nothing else.
Aquarius (January 22 – February 19) – not present RPL
From late January to mid-February none of the clubs RPL was not born. Non-flying weather for football in Russia right now. Thanks to ingenious reforms, even with the onset of spring, empty stands can remain. And pour water in the clubs RPL know-how in the field and without the Aquarium among the participants.
Pisces (February 20 – March 20) – Krasnodar
Under the sign of Pisces it is also “Royal”. What do they have in common with Krasnodar? Defense Adventures. Astrologers say Pisces will get what they want this year. While the “citizens” are roasted in the field, although a delicious breading of attacks is also on the menu. They should dedicate the Year of the Rabbit to rethinking. He made a star move in Galicia: he invited Ivic and Perez is just getting ready. His “golden” fish will swim to trophies under the guidance of a new coach.
Also, do not forget about fans of famous European giants. Barcelona is under the sign of Sagittarius, Bayern is Pisces, like Real Madrid. Juventus-Scorpio. Manchester City under its current name is based under the sign of Taurus, and today the stars are definitely for them. But at a distance Libra Arsenal can overtake Guardiola in the standings. The Liverpool twins play in all competitions in much the same way that the Zenit twins play in cup matches. “Chelsea” Manchester United and Ajax – Pisces, the second thought advice is exactly right for them. PSG – Leo, but as “Torpedo”, with a vague future.
People just don’t believe in anything. It’s also funny that in almost all horoscopes for the year there are statements that a healthy lifestyle has a good effect on well-being. Here, we wish it to all clubs and fans, regardless of the zodiac sign.
